Save the Date Cards. Haphazard Lifestyle Advice: How to Wedding, Part 3

Next in our How to Wedding series: save the date cards.

Honestly? We considered skipping them. There’s a huge part of me that feels like the double-invitation trend (save the dates and then invitations later) is a waste of time, effort, and dollars. I mean, why not just send an invitation? One and done. Half the cost. Voila! 

In the end, though, Abby and Chandler chose save the date cards for the reason I imagine many do. While we’re fully ready to ignore any of the traditional wedding protocols that don’t make sense to us (like waiting until 6-8 weeks prior to the wedding to send invitations when we could send one months in advance, instead), we weren’t ready to settle on all the final wedding details that would appear in the invitation — ceremony time, reception time, etc. ...  read more

10 Things I Used to Think… What About You?

1. I used to think brindle colored dogs were ugly, and tortoise shell cats, too, like a coven of hyenas held a secret midnight seance and magicked bits of their coats onto domesticated animals to make them mottled and homely and less likely to be adored than other, more beguiling creatures, but then I realized I was the one busy assigning worth based on appearance which seems to me now to be both silly and reprehensible, and I wonder what else I’ve gotten wrong. ...  read more

The Ring! Haphazard Lifestyle Advice: How to Wedding, Part 2

Can we have a frank discussion about money, please? And the wise spending of it? And how to STOP and THINK about funds and goals and the best paths forward? And how to make decisions based on What Actually Works for Your Budget and Your Life instead of on Cultural Norms? 

Because I have some Words in that regard to BLESS YOU WITH today, friends. Some Haphazard Lifestyle Advice, Beth Woolsey style, with special thanks to my very own Abby and her very own Chandler, because they’re letting me tell you All the Things, and I’m grateful. ...  read more

Haphazard Lifestyle Advice: How to Wedding, Part 1

I’ve said for quite some time, when describing it to people who ask, that this blog space is like a lifestyle blog, except the opposite. You know? Like, when I think lifestyle blog, I think Martha Stewart or Goop or Chrissy Teigen (whom I ❤️ and with whom I am well pleased) . Someplace neat and tidy and pretty and delicious, right? I definitely do not think of a mentally ill mother of five who pooped her closet. Or who plays I Spy with the items found under her couch. Or who shows off the Ancient Horrifying Golem Stubs ™, ℠, ®, © that exist underneath her dental makeover.  ...  read more

I’ve Been Thinking About Kindness a Lot Lately. Really, I’d Say It’s All I Think About Anymore.

I’ve been thinking a lot about kindness lately. Really, I’d say it’s all I think about anymore. Kindness and strangers. Kindness and kids. Kindness and politics. Kindness and cages. Kindness and marriage. Kindness and sex. Kindness and time. Kindness and self. And kindness and how to push more into the universe like a brilliant shaft of light from my belly, Care Bear style.  ...  read more

You Don’t Need the Oxford Dictionary to Go Hiking: Some Thoughts on Walking and Life

I had a dream the other night. I was hiking with friends, and there was something in my shoe stuck to my sock just past the ball of my left foot. Not enough to hurt me immediately but enough to be irritating and cause a problem if I left it there too long.

I sat down in the middle of the trail in my nylon runner’s short shorts, navy blue with white trim like the kind I wore to Ladera Elementary School in the 4th grade when I got called into the principal’s office for being immodest by showing off too much of my nine-year-old legs. I sat down in the dry dust on the mountain pass, and my friends stopped, too, and I pulled off my shoe to examine my sock and find the burr or the rock or the gritty ball of sap stuck there. ...  read more

New Plan: Communes. Everywhere.

Last month, I traveled

And traveled.

And traveled.

With you.

Or maybe not specifically with YOU-you.

But with humans who are fun, and funny, and fully unapologetically themselves, and willing to be real and have vulnerable convos, and break bread and clink glasses, and make inappropriate jokes, and welcome others in.

So PRACTICALLY with you, yes? Which is probably not much consolation when others got to eat the fresh Italian pasta, but I have an idea to fix that, and it’s this: ...  read more