19 May 2020 — The COVID Diaries: Staying Sane in a Time That’s Not

Dear Diary,

Today was our annual meeting in cooperation with Ian, his social worker, and his care provider to write and edit his Individual Support Plan (ISP) and update the detailed report of his needs, interests, and preferences, as well as what services he requires as an adult who experiences intellectual and developmental disability. It comprises an enormous battery of information, including his areas of strength and vulnerability in medical, financial, behavioral, social, emotional, and vocational arenas. Everything from yes, he balances well and can walk up and down stairs unassisted to no, he still doesn’t like pasta. Also, he wants to own a macaw someday. But, really, who doesn’t? ...  read more

9 May 2020 — The COVID Diaries: Staying Sane in a Time That’s Not

Dear Diary,

Today’s the day. Abby and Chandler’s college graduation in the stadium in Honolulu.

The cheering and being the Too Loud Mommy one more time as they walk across the stage.

The chaos of trying to find them afterward and lei them with the flowers I sent Greg to buy in Chinatown this morning.

The big party on the lanai in Abby’s building with all their friends, thrown with Audrey’s family — Abby’s bestie from kindergarten through their senior year of college — seventeen years in a row of school together, seeing each other through triumph and trauma. ...  read more

18 April 2020 — The COVID Diaries: Staying Sane in a Time That’s Not

Dear Diary,

I’M SO SORRY I FORGOT TO TELL YOU WHICH WIENERS WE LIKED BEST.

I wrote to you yesterday about our very official, blind taste test: Nathan’s Beef Franks vs. Hebrew National. 

Honestly, Hebrew National has been my favorite for years, so I assumed they’d be the winner even though I’ve never had Nathan’s.

Then I looked at the hot dogs and they look virtually the same in the package, so I thought they’d tie. ...  read more

13 April 2020 — The COVID Diaries: Staying Sane in a Time That’s Not

Dear Diary,

I spend most of every day worried about the Mommies of Littles.*

(*And probably the Daddies of Littles who are the primary caregivers, as well… it’s just that my experience is as a Mommy, so feel free to substitute gender as you see fit.)

I think about the Mommies constantly. It is, I’d say, the most consistent thought I have during this period of isolation. ...  read more

3,000 March 2020 — The COVID Diaries: Staying Sane in a Time That’s Not

Dear Diary,

I made waffles for breakfast last Thursday. I prepared my sourdough sponge the night before. I was awake before All the Children. I made myself a cup of coffee, and I puttered around the kitchen, and I thought, “Oh, this is why Morning People like getting up before everyone else. It’s so quiet and calming and lovely. I have a Start on the Day. I have time with a Quiet Brain before everyone chatters at me.”  ...  read more

21 March 2020 — The COVID Diaries: Staying Sane in a Time That’s Not

Dear Diary,

Once upon a time, when I was 13ish, I lived with my family in a remote village in the highlands of Papua, Indonesia. The Dani tribeswomen wore string skirts and no tops and would sit on the ground in a field on market day to sell greens and sweet potatoes, handing a dangling breast like it was a sandwich to whatever child was sitting next to them feeling peckish. The kids held the boobs like sandwiches, too — flattened with two hands and gnawing on the ends. The tribesmen wore hollowed, dried gourds tied with strings around their waists and up their butts like g-strings to cover their bits — the bigger the gourd the better, obvs — and they stood near the women to make change for their purchases, grabbing money out of their wallets, shuffling it around, and shoving it back inside when the transaction was complete. Their gourds weren’t just their penis covers, Diary; they were also their wallets. So we learned thorough hand washing and not to ever — EVER — put money in our mouths earlier than we otherwise might have. #LifeSkill  But even though the men’s gourds were a feat of magic and engineering, I was WAY more fascinated by the boobs. Never had I ever seen body parts stretch so far. And the VARIETY. My goodness. The shapes and peaks and valleys were as varied as the mountains, each pair like a fingerprint — totally unique. And uniquely lovely, especially in their practicality. ...  read more